Whether it bring you excitement, or an overwhelming sense of unease.....
The new year is nearly upon us.
And while I'm sure the forthcoming 365 days are sure to be filled with the universe's mockeries fo my life, hopefully things will smooth over a little bit in my dark little world. My resolutions are simple and few: to keep on trudging (forward, if possible), go to Japan, and get a full time job.
Okay, so perhaps going to Japan doesn't really qualify as simple.
Screw technicalities.
On a less thought-filled note, I would like to take a moment to proclaim the glory, that is Yahoo Launchast. Free music goodness with a mere click of the mouse. This might seem a bit sudden, since I don't think I've ever actually mentioned it here before, but as I've been blaring it for the past ten hours striaght, I thought "I must blog about this."
Cause' just assloads of people are going to read about it here, since we all know what a vast readership I have.
Ah well.
Heheheh.
Lauchcast still kicks ass.
To the grindstone with you....
Monday, December 26, 2005
Christmas came, Christmas went. All that's left to do now is hide in my dungeon until the last of the holiday cheer fades away.
So I'm a Scrooge. Gotta problem with it? (If you do, there really isn't anything to be done about it.)
To continue ruining the spirit of the season, I've decided to once and for all get my complaints down all in one nice, neat, blog post list. Think of it as a great way for me to stop repeating myself.
THINGS I HATE ABOUT MY LIFE
1.) Complaining about my life.
2.) My job(s).
3.) Having to wear color at work.
4.) Having to be nice.
5.) Not having ambition.
5.) Dealing with people.
6.) Being the Parental sounding board.
7. ) Inadequacy.
8.) My extended family.
9.) Slow Internet connection.
10.) The Brat's stupid mistakes bleeding over into my life.
11.) Having to work.
12.) Having missed out on being a teenager in any respect.
13. Hating missing out on being a teenager in any respect.
14.) That damned sense of obligation.
15.) Family favoritism, in my "favor" or not.
16.) Constantly being trapped in one place.
17.) Obligation.
18.) Unrealistic expectations.
19.) Not having any money.
20.) Never being left alone.
There you have it. Twenty blantant, immature complaints, that from henceforth, won't ever (probably) grace my blog again. It's like hitting a whole damned flock of birds with a stone. Heheheh.
Now just for the sake of some balance I'll include a small, short list of a few things I can concede are going for me:
THINGS THAT DON'T COMPLETELY SUCK ABOUT MY LIFE
1.) I'm not living in a third world country.
2.) I'm not living in New Orleans.
3.) I have a computer with Internet access.
4.) I won't be shot for wearing black and being-Hell forbid the label-gothic.
5.) I was able to find employment in the first place.
Heh.
That was either one step up the ladder towards Nirvana, one one step farther into the flaming abyss.
Eh.
So I'm a Scrooge. Gotta problem with it? (If you do, there really isn't anything to be done about it.)
To continue ruining the spirit of the season, I've decided to once and for all get my complaints down all in one nice, neat, blog post list. Think of it as a great way for me to stop repeating myself.
THINGS I HATE ABOUT MY LIFE
1.) Complaining about my life.
2.) My job(s).
3.) Having to wear color at work.
4.) Having to be nice.
5.) Not having ambition.
5.) Dealing with people.
6.) Being the Parental sounding board.
7. ) Inadequacy.
8.) My extended family.
9.) Slow Internet connection.
10.) The Brat's stupid mistakes bleeding over into my life.
11.) Having to work.
12.) Having missed out on being a teenager in any respect.
13. Hating missing out on being a teenager in any respect.
14.) That damned sense of obligation.
15.) Family favoritism, in my "favor" or not.
16.) Constantly being trapped in one place.
17.) Obligation.
18.) Unrealistic expectations.
19.) Not having any money.
20.) Never being left alone.
There you have it. Twenty blantant, immature complaints, that from henceforth, won't ever (probably) grace my blog again. It's like hitting a whole damned flock of birds with a stone. Heheheh.
Now just for the sake of some balance I'll include a small, short list of a few things I can concede are going for me:
THINGS THAT DON'T COMPLETELY SUCK ABOUT MY LIFE
1.) I'm not living in a third world country.
2.) I'm not living in New Orleans.
3.) I have a computer with Internet access.
4.) I won't be shot for wearing black and being-Hell forbid the label-gothic.
5.) I was able to find employment in the first place.
Heh.
That was either one step up the ladder towards Nirvana, one one step farther into the flaming abyss.
Eh.
Row row row your boat slowly out of steam, the boss is calling the truck is stalling, isn't life a scream?
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Another session of "let's bitch and moan".
Yay.
Last night I was picking some stuff up at Best Buy, only to have one of my co-workers come up to me and say:
"You know your shift started ten minutes ago right?"
I won't go into my response. It was loud, and it was particularly colorful. (Heh.)
The only upside is, I refused to run all the way home to grab my work stuff, so I did an entire shift in black and chains. Heheheh.
I also managed to break my cell phone.
Needless to say, I've had better evenings. I so just wish I could recoil back into my little dungeon and spend the rest of my pathetic life as a hermit. Hehh.....
I'm done now.
Yay.
Last night I was picking some stuff up at Best Buy, only to have one of my co-workers come up to me and say:
"You know your shift started ten minutes ago right?"
I won't go into my response. It was loud, and it was particularly colorful. (Heh.)
The only upside is, I refused to run all the way home to grab my work stuff, so I did an entire shift in black and chains. Heheheh.
I also managed to break my cell phone.
Needless to say, I've had better evenings. I so just wish I could recoil back into my little dungeon and spend the rest of my pathetic life as a hermit. Hehh.....
I'm done now.
Ask for a break and the whole dam comes crashing down
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
..........This is turning out to be the foulest of days.
And it's barely even nine thirty.
In all of my wishing in the wee hours, that work would suddenly dissapear into oblivion, I daresay this wasn't what I had in mind. And just what is it that I didn't envision?
Waking up an hour late, only to find that the furance guys have their truck stuck in the driveway, with no other way to get out.
Argh.
I hate my life.
But at least I have my Internet.
Heheheheh.
And it's barely even nine thirty.
In all of my wishing in the wee hours, that work would suddenly dissapear into oblivion, I daresay this wasn't what I had in mind. And just what is it that I didn't envision?
Waking up an hour late, only to find that the furance guys have their truck stuck in the driveway, with no other way to get out.
Argh.
I hate my life.
But at least I have my Internet.
Heheheheh.
Life is like a triathlon.....fbeng run by chain smokers.
It's almost one in the morning, and I've been at work the better part of the last ten hours. So, after a lengthy drive hope, and scarcely being able to keep my eyes open, what do I do?
Go online.
Heh.
It's my own way of dealing with the horror of having to bullshit cheerfulness for such a long period of time. In all honestly, I couldn't even portay a facial expression at this point even if I wanted to. My face wasn't built to smile; merely to be in a constant apathetic gaze.
I had debated calling in today. It would have been so terribly easy. Alas, though, I can't let myself get too in the habit of doing such a thing. It leads to an even more downward spiral in the life and times of my ambition. Heh. I must be very careful with my ambition. You see, the thing with me is, when I say I'm tempted to quit my job and live the rest of my life as a poor pathetic hermit......I might actually do it.
A mere moment, and I could quit both my jobs and live on the "good"will of the Bastardly Parental Units.
But as it stands, I've managed to keep my ambition from falling completely over the deep end. Damned adult responsibilty and all that epic bullshit.
.................I'm really tired.
I should go to sleep. I really, really should. I have to get up in mere hours to go back into work. Yet it calls to me, my beloved cyberspace. Like a massive black hole pulling me into oblivion......
Overdramatic?
Yes.
But I'm too fucking out of it to care.
So I guess I'll just sit here, exhaustively basking in the glory that is my Internet, until I inevitably fall asleep at the keyboard, only to be awakened by the proverbial banging of the slaver's drum, beckoning me back to my doom..
.......Yeah.
Go online.
Heh.
It's my own way of dealing with the horror of having to bullshit cheerfulness for such a long period of time. In all honestly, I couldn't even portay a facial expression at this point even if I wanted to. My face wasn't built to smile; merely to be in a constant apathetic gaze.
I had debated calling in today. It would have been so terribly easy. Alas, though, I can't let myself get too in the habit of doing such a thing. It leads to an even more downward spiral in the life and times of my ambition. Heh. I must be very careful with my ambition. You see, the thing with me is, when I say I'm tempted to quit my job and live the rest of my life as a poor pathetic hermit......I might actually do it.
A mere moment, and I could quit both my jobs and live on the "good"will of the Bastardly Parental Units.
But as it stands, I've managed to keep my ambition from falling completely over the deep end. Damned adult responsibilty and all that epic bullshit.
.................I'm really tired.
I should go to sleep. I really, really should. I have to get up in mere hours to go back into work. Yet it calls to me, my beloved cyberspace. Like a massive black hole pulling me into oblivion......
Overdramatic?
Yes.
But I'm too fucking out of it to care.
So I guess I'll just sit here, exhaustively basking in the glory that is my Internet, until I inevitably fall asleep at the keyboard, only to be awakened by the proverbial banging of the slaver's drum, beckoning me back to my doom..
.......Yeah.
Knocking on the mental doors, hoping no one answers
Saturday, December 10, 2005
Just got home from work.
I have, just for the record, been at work since myh last post.
Just so you know.
Something I've really been wondering lately though, exactly who is this "you" that I speak of?Honestly, does anyone ACTUALLY read this? In my year and a half of blogging, I'm nearly convinced that only a well resounding three people (including myself) have taken anything even close to a passing glance at it.
Don't take that to mean that I'm bitching and whining because nobody is paying attention to me.
It's just one of those observations I occassionally have to make.
I blog more for myself than anything. Gives me something to read and remind me of just how far over the edge I've gone. Some people keep diaries, some people skip the formalities and just post it up for the whole cyber world to see.
The ironic thing about it is: more people would probably read it if it was in a diary. Heh. Heh. Heh.
......Okay, enough "observing" about the nonexistent readers of my blog. Moving on.
I would rather like to see the new Chronicles of Narnia movie soon. It looks like that might become a movie series that could rival Lord of the Rings....only moreso, just because there are more books in the series. I vaguely recall the plot; I read the series sometime in second or third grade (always had to pick the big ones....), though it's been so long I might actually be suprised. Either way, if I can somehow dig up a few spare dollars out of my wallet, I'm definetly going to try and see it tomorrow.
Why?
Because that's the nice thing about me. When the real world manages to annoy me to the point of seriously considering quitting my job and spending the rest of my days as a pathetic hermit that leeches off the dwindling funds of her parents, I can space out, haul my ass to a world made by someone far more creative than myself, and get back to that apathetic place so that when the movie is over and I'm once again slaving away at the grindstone.......
I really don't care either way.
Score one for the movies.
I have, just for the record, been at work since myh last post.
Just so you know.
Something I've really been wondering lately though, exactly who is this "you" that I speak of?Honestly, does anyone ACTUALLY read this? In my year and a half of blogging, I'm nearly convinced that only a well resounding three people (including myself) have taken anything even close to a passing glance at it.
Don't take that to mean that I'm bitching and whining because nobody is paying attention to me.
It's just one of those observations I occassionally have to make.
I blog more for myself than anything. Gives me something to read and remind me of just how far over the edge I've gone. Some people keep diaries, some people skip the formalities and just post it up for the whole cyber world to see.
The ironic thing about it is: more people would probably read it if it was in a diary. Heh. Heh. Heh.
......Okay, enough "observing" about the nonexistent readers of my blog. Moving on.
I would rather like to see the new Chronicles of Narnia movie soon. It looks like that might become a movie series that could rival Lord of the Rings....only moreso, just because there are more books in the series. I vaguely recall the plot; I read the series sometime in second or third grade (always had to pick the big ones....), though it's been so long I might actually be suprised. Either way, if I can somehow dig up a few spare dollars out of my wallet, I'm definetly going to try and see it tomorrow.
Why?
Because that's the nice thing about me. When the real world manages to annoy me to the point of seriously considering quitting my job and spending the rest of my days as a pathetic hermit that leeches off the dwindling funds of her parents, I can space out, haul my ass to a world made by someone far more creative than myself, and get back to that apathetic place so that when the movie is over and I'm once again slaving away at the grindstone.......
I really don't care either way.
Score one for the movies.
Being deaf, dumb and blind is for those who are TRULY blissfully ignorant.
Friday, December 09, 2005
It's the cursed anniversary of my birth.
And I hate my job.
Fuckers.
And I hate my job.
Fuckers.
One step farther from the edge of existence....
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
I have a computer.
More importantly, I have DSL.
Heh.
Hehhehehehehehehehehehehehheheheheheh.
Life, dispite all it's horrific annoyances, now goes on.
In matters of less importance, a funny thing happened today whilst up in the creepy rafters of my new house, looking for one of the furnaces to insulate:
Boy (my older brother) *fake drawling southern accent*: I's do believe it be this way.....
*proceeds to climb through some tight boards*
*I follow*
Me: *mimicking in monotone* Well, I's do believe I don't bend this way......
............................
Dammit. You know it's funny.
Heh.
More importantly, I have DSL.
Heh.
Hehhehehehehehehehehehehehheheheheheh.
Life, dispite all it's horrific annoyances, now goes on.
In matters of less importance, a funny thing happened today whilst up in the creepy rafters of my new house, looking for one of the furnaces to insulate:
Boy (my older brother) *fake drawling southern accent*: I's do believe it be this way.....
*proceeds to climb through some tight boards*
*I follow*
Me: *mimicking in monotone* Well, I's do believe I don't bend this way......
............................
Dammit. You know it's funny.
Heh.
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