Sulking in the land of unemployment.

Alright, so it probably isn't the best idea to blog when I'm half awake.

Eh.

Another Monday. Thankfully, it wasn't too death defyingly mundane (not that it was exactly riviting either...eheheh). At least though, I can look forward to spring break, which happens to start on Friday. As I've quite stupidly decided to try and blog when I'm half asleep, I'll give you the lazy type of blog post. BEHOLD....

5 WAYS TO BE DULL LIKE ME:

1.) Spend countless hours online, even if it means staring at your email inbox.
2.) Find amusement in throwing a ball at a wall....for hours.
3.) Poke a piece of paper with a pen, ignoring the fact that the pen doesn't even work.
4.) Practice writing backwards...just for the hell of it.
5.) Instead of going out and hanging out with "friends" like most normal people, space out in your room instead, making sure that your windows are amply blocked out and the lights off so that you can truly wallow in darkness.

So that was rather mediocre. Heheheheheheh. At least I blogged. I'll just go on telling myself that one day I'll go back to posting relatively interesting things.

Who knows, I might just believe it.

When the abyss stares back at you, gouge it's eyes out.

Another long overdue blog post.

I suppose I should say something relatively entertaining. Who here really wants to here me complain and get all overly angsty?

Eh. Tomorrow perhaps.

One doesn't even need to be metaphorical to consider this week a marathon. Even having taken a day off (Monday, I believe it was), this week still managed to drag. Of course, I blame that more on the winter weather more than anything. Spring starts soon and we've just had another blizzard. I'm sure the universe is just going out of it's way to apease my inner massochist. Heh. But anyway....

I've finally gotten to pick up my comics from the comic book store. It's been about four months since the last time I stopped it. Frankly, I'm rather suprised the guy kept saving them for me. Completely worth the $63 they cost. I really shouldn't have let the She-Beast buy them for me as we have other things that quite seriously needs to be spent on.

Oh well.

Also, for once I'm oing to take a moment to flat out complain. Oh yes. An unbridled complaint that has been festering for the past week:

If I hear one more person suggest "get a job" when I say I don't have the money for something, I'm going to bash their heads in with a crowbar. (A baseball bat would be far too cliche for my personal tastes....heheheh)

One does not just pull a job out of their ass and bask in the glory of an income. One has to get hired. It's not a sure thing that just because one applies to ten different places that the job offers are going to flood in. More likely than not you're going to be sitting in the proverbial desert of unemployment. Like me. I've applied everywhere in town and yet nothing. So excuse me if I'm a little bitter when I hear the "get a job" line.

But that's all I have to say on that matter. Blantant complaining annoys me....especially when I'm the one doing it.

On a final note for the evening...............

Buffy lives.

I'll post something tomorrow. Perhaps even something faintly interesting and sarcastically humorious. Everyone just feel free to die of overwhelming anticipation.

It's because of optimists that the world is shocked when they see suffering.

My Internet was supposedly down for a couple days. Supposedly meaning, it didn't work for two days, we figured the bill wasn't paid, and when I went on the computer a few days later to watch something, an IM popped up.

The Internet addict in me mourns all the lost time that could have been spent online.

Basically, I didn't leave my room for four days. I found it rather amusing that during the middle of the afternoon on a sunny day (that was horrendously cold), I sat in my room with the windows blocked out, lit only by a blacklight. Heh. Actually, that brings me back to the days before I had a computer. But I'm not even going to go there.....

Onto other pointless things.

Another glitch seems to be hindering our move once again. The She-Beast, with all her enthusiasm for the place we just bought, has just announced that she wants us all to move to Montana. Sure, keep the place we bought for investment purposes, but build our life anew in the land of opportunity and wide open spaces.

In other words, in the goddamned middle of nowhere.

I may be a self described teenage hermit, but being in a state that isn't even worth it's own football team is not a thought I am fond of. Actually, I probably won't go if she does. Being 18 does have a few (very) advantages I suppose. It fucks up my entire plan after High School, but it's better than the alternative I suppose. Ugh. Life insists on incessantly throwing these flaming curveballs my way............

I wonder how long it'll be before I strike out....heh....

I'm only dead cause' I'm alive.

The future.

One of those hideous concepts that at this time of year, it is becoming increasingly difficult to avoid having to think about and consider. After all, if all goes according to plan, I graduate in just barely three months. I should probably feel anxious and excited.

Pity I know what a bitch the real world is going to be.

Where the hell did all that blissful ignorance of mine go? I could really use it about now. Instead, I'm consumed with utter denial as to the fact that my comparatively carefree world (in terms of financial obligations, taxes, and all that other annoying stuff) is about to end. All those smiling counselors and teachers that beam at you and spew such crap like "You have the best part of your life ahead of you" or "Your future's just beginning" are beginning to make me rather sick.

Thank you, but as any (or most) older people will tell you, the best part of my life is already over. High School sucks when you're in it, but come the 40's, you realize just how much better it is than being stuck having to be at work all day. And sure, my future is just beginning.....to end.

I suppose that is a bit overly pessimistic. Yes, I'm sure there are plenty of people who fully look forward to their years after high school, along with their prospective careers. But I myself am just going to do the dutifully dark thing and taint it all with my negativity.

But I think that was sufficient enough. Right now, I'm going to go and grab some Advil. A long field trip to one of the local technical colleges has given me a migrane.

On a side note, a word of warning: Don't ever buy half a pizza, a chicken sandwich, chicken tenders, and two Cokes and not expect to feel sick afterwards. Heheh.

Try to kill me and I'll drag you down to Hell as I fall, bleeding.

Heh.

I've become half curious as to why I bother with this blog. I mean, I haven't exactly said anything of real note, nor anything particularly personal. Even in a relatively anonymous online "diary" as it were, (aside from those few reading me who know me on my messengers...yeah...hi.) I've managed to leave out an astonishing amount of personal thoughts and opinions.

When I said the other day that my sense of reality was a bit skewed, I don't think I was kidding.

It's 8:40 in the morning. Normally, I'd walk downstairs, grab a Coke, and blog about something odd or interesting I saw the other day, dispite the fact that I really in fact, don't give a flying fuck about that odd or interesting thing. There are quite a large amount of things I haven't mentioned, things which are more than blog worthy. I'm not sure if it's my tendancy to distance myself from heh, myself or the obscene laziness that seems to have overtaken me these past two months.

Today I find myself rather sick of it all. I don't know if it's because I woke up a bit earlier than I should have (7 a.m. on a weekend is practically unheard of) or if I'm just in one of those overly thoughtful moods that I haven't seen since the first few weeks of my blog. Indeed, I reread my blog this morning and noticed how increasingly impersonal it's become. Not that I can really call a blog personal, but of course, I'm sure anyone reading can catch my drift. At this point though, I doubt that the situation can be remedied. I've lost the ability to even go past casual conversation with my parents. Not that I've ever really gone deeper than that with my Dad (the Beast as I should really keep referring him as). He's quite possibly the only person more dilluded than I am. But then again, his reality check is coming swiftly in the form of a mid life crisis. I shouldn't really laugh, but I find it amusing somehow. The man who calls me a lazy asshole with no sense of the real world is going to look in the mirror and see the reflection of someone who hasn't held a lucrative job in years, never graduated high school, doesn't know his kids anymore, and spends his recent days sleeping in front of a TV with no sense of purpose left in his life.

Pleasant eh?

I always like my life, admittedly, a little bit on the bleak side. I am dark by nature-probably moreso than is healthy. I'm not one to crave a Brady Bunch happy family living in the suburbs with lots of money and repsectable jobs. I crave honesty. Not necessarily spill-your-heart-out-to-anyone-interested but if anything, a recognition of who you really are. I myself may be distant, but at least I can be the first to admit that I'm far too antisocial for my own good, with a lack of ambition that is going to put me right where I belong: a deadend job flipping burgers or bagging groceries. It really does run in the family doesn't it?

Anyway, there's my little speech for the day. Back to the battlefield, I suppose.

Spikes: Useful torture devices as well as stylish jewlery.

As mentioned in yeseterday's post, I said I'd blog about something somewhat meanwhile...here it is. Heh. I think. My sense of reality tends to be a bit skewed these days....

The other day, I saw one of the most amusing signs I think I shall ever see in the rest of my entire existance.

The She-Beast and I were on our way to the DMV. (A hideously long wait just for a couple of damned stickers....) when we drove past a cemetary. On the fence near the gate was a large blue sign. It read:

"FUNERAL PLOTS!!!! ON SALE NOW!!!!!"

Frankly, it looked like one of those overly cheerful Wal-Mart ads or something. I half expected some rather pale version of the Wal-Mart smiley to be pasted onto the front of it. But I suppose the horrors of modern day advertising was bound to catch up to the mortuary business sooner or later.

In other strange events this week (more precisely, today):

In English class, I sit next to someone who could be categorized (where I lowly enough to use labels...heh...heheheh...) as an obnoxious-though-rather-convincing-from-a-distance goth. The teacher had stepped out for a moment, and the rest of the class was silently occupying themselves with a reading assignment. A fiendish idea came to mind, and when I presented it to him (without actually expecting him to really do it) he stood up from his desk, took a step forward and all of the sudden leaped into the air and scream (emphasis on screamed...):

"MIDGETS!!!!!!!!!"

The whole class burst into a fit of shocked conversation, after a moment of stunned, open-mouthed silence. Even I had to laugh at that.

Yeah, I'll admit it, even I crave a bit of odd humor every now and then. But why waste the energy being funny myself, when I can just as easily make a subtle suggestion for someone else to do it. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

But I digress.

Okay, actually I really don't. I don't exactly have a specific subject to "digress" from, but in any case, I'll move onto something else.

I applied at McDonald's a couple of days ago. Haven't heard anything yet, but I hope to find employment soon-even if it is flipping burgers. Money and new DVDs call to me and yet still I remain with an empty wallet. I daresay the moths will move in again soon....

Ah, finally a sufficiently long and not entirely (though perhaps quite a bit) boring. My task for today is complete. If you take that to mean that I centered my whole day on one blog post, in some aspect, you're probably right.

But hey, I never denied being an Internet and blogging addict did I? Heheheheheheheheheheh.

Stare into nothingness and you will see....well, nothing.

I don't really have anything to say today. This post was more of a quick assurance to the world, as well as myself that I have in fact, not forgotten my blog. There are things of interest worth mentioning, but will be mentioned tomorrow.

Most definetly tomorrow.

Begone my laziness in blogging will be, and from the firey ashes of my shadowy corner in Hell I will post...tomorrow.

And if you think I'm being overdramatic in that last statement, yeah, I really was. It doesn't matter though, it'll all be forgotten soon enough.

With that, I'm off to my dark cave to brood and perhaps, horrifically enough, fall asleep.