Nostalgic Evil

Aloha, from the Isle of Bitter Cold, home to beer wielding rednecks and overzealous Packer fans.

The wretched workweek has ended, and in true avoid-real-life-at-all-costs fashion, I have immersed myself in the most hallowed of all of my obsessions:

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.

Oh yes, before there was Batman, or Buffy, or Star Trek, there were five color-coordinated teens, and the coolest under-clothed superbaddie ever. Sure, the show was full of vaguely sexist cheese, and enough recycled footage from Japan to make Godzilla giddy, but it was a thing of glory to an eight-year old me. Of course, here we are: I'm twenty-three, and the series is recycling far more than old Japanese footage these days....but I digress.

I found out on Thursday that Bandai has released new versions of the old MMPR (from hence, the acronym to be used as I laze my life away) merchandise, and today I found myself at Wal-Mart in an aisleful of glorious, glorious nostalgia. I admit, even I felt a little foolish as I gawped longingly at the somewhat cheaply made Dinozord (which I ended up ordering online. *cough* ), and brooded deeply over the authenticity of "zords" that were most definitely never a part of the show. I bought much, to my wallet's dismay, and made it even worse by coming home to Ebay, where I promptly bought an original 1993 Dragonzord from someone decidedly less clingy to the fantasy realm than I.

Because I know you all care deeply, I'll post a picture of the loot when it's all been collected. B-)

In celebration of this great achievement in my Life As A Nerd, I've assembled a a list of my top five superbaddies of all time:

1.) Lord Zedd (MMPR). He was a childhood idol of mine. A do-no gooder that just looks really awesome. He was probably my first real influence in dry humor and darkness. Unless we're counting Oscar the Grouch, and we're not.

2.) Darth Vader. It's really kind of obligatory; you don't reference "superbaddies" in a list and not include everyone's favorite assisted-breathing father. Explanations are superfluous in the wake of someone with that much cultural significance.

3.) The Joker. As a kid, I thought he was a clever little bastard. As an adult, and post "The Killing Joke", I think of him as a truly sick, depraved being, dressed in colorful irony. Perhaps one of the most dangerous villains on my list, and at the very least, the most intellectually intriguing.

4.) Sephiroth. A quiet, unintentionally gothic figure. He's got the full force of Square's ability to wax melodramatic behind him, and also, I want his hair. O_o

5.) Angelus. While perhaps theoretically on par with The Joker in malevolence, such was never fully realized due to the television medium, and that getting-a-soul snag. Still, a great baddie in the Buffyverse, and even more so in a few choice episodes of Angel.

So there you have it, The Five (there's a television reference here somewhere, but it escapes me). I'm thinking of doing a top five list of some sort every Monday, just for the Hell of it. We'll see how long that idea lasts until my ADD erases it utterly.

Until next time, folks.